Posts

Showing posts from September, 2020

Transformational love

When I was a little girl, the world told me that when you're in love, everything feels different. Everything starts to change. At least, that's what I saw in the movies. The leaves change their colors and the sky looks prettier and everything seems just about perfect when you are in love. But what no one told me was that falling in "love," would also change who I am. I never thought that being in a relationship would cost me my identity. I never thought my love and attraction for another would consume me in entirety and I would start to neglect and discard pieces of my personality. My likes, my favorite music, my ideology, my friends, my family and even my passions. Nobody tells you that when you "fall in love" you also lose in love. You lose the best and most precious parts of yourself almost subconsciously so that you don't even realize how much you have changed. Then when you're heartbroken, when your trust is shattered into a billion pieces, wh…

Fervor Fever

I've always envied people who are soaked in their dedication and perseveration for something they're passionate about. You know those people you occasionally come across who are hungry to achieve their professional goals and are walking on the path that leads right to it.  Those people who inspire you and burn your self-esteem at the same time. When I listen to someone talk about how they spent the whole night researching some random concept even though they didn't have to, I'm absolutely dumbstruck and left in a state of awe. They just did it because they wanted to. I think that's just brilliant (mostly because I usually sleep and procrastinate all the time) and they make it sound so natural and easy. How are some people so focused and completely diluted in their work? Sometimes I wonder why I'm not that diligent. I haven't found that raw hungry burning desire that makes a person forget the rest of the world, forget any sense of time and space. I haven'…